had a gig tonight with puty’s rapala. the band can play some nice
blues, but really were all just amateurs. im really tired.
this last week has been really nice. tomorrow im going to the
kick off dance, first dance of the year. that should be
exciting. haha. talked to bryan yesterday for the first
time since school started. he basically saved me from being
sexually harrassed by jonothan. im not kidding, bryan looked like
he was ready to kill someone, naming no names (*cough* jonothan
*cough*). dont know why jonothan thinks he can get away with his
crap. “im just joking with you” doesnt quite cut it when youre
trying to unsnap a girls bra. for real. anyways. so
the kangaroo and i are doing ok, i guess. danny wont talk to
me. dont know why. the next time i see him, though, i know
hes gonna be like “heey, how are you? havent talked to you in a
while, blah blah blah” like nothings weird or anything. what a
blaaaaaaah. she wants some raspberry iced tea. thats what
she wants. david wants to go to a concert with me in
november. in la. which is cool, i wanna see him
again. but i dont know who the band is. ive been listening
to them online and its like, theyre really cool, kinda remind me of an
indie version of relient k. they have this name though.
who in their right mind would call their band “death cab for cutie”?
haha. but they are a pretty cool band.
i tried to tell you. i tried to let you know. the air is so
cold down here. lying on the floor, looking up at the
ceiling. trying to find faces and animals in the crevasses.
but all i see is your face, hovering in front of me. why do you
ask me if im ok? ill never let go. but dont worry,
everything is going to be all right. this time. if you take
my hand tonight. i promise i wont let you down. i wont
stumble this time. why cant i tell you that i care?? –what
difference does it make? nothing changes reality. but
reality always changes. so where did i end up? not crashing
and burning, going down in flames. not pulling the noose
tighter. not one step away from the ledge. simply lying on
the floor. waiting for the ceiling to fall down on me.
everything else already has.